Chapter 2: Swindle and Slaughter
Our journey brought us to the middle of the woods, where we had camped for the night after our long battle against the orc chieftain and his troops. As we awoke to continue our journey toward the keep, we were ambushed by some ferocious winter wolves who were long due for a large meal. Unfortunately for them, we had other plans besides being digested over the next few ours.
The five large wolves mostly hunted in a pack, but our dwarven ally, Tasuf, got the attention of four of the five of them, while the fifth chased after my cousin and I. With great haste, I made my way up the nearest tree and proceeded to have the wolf bite itself while Shale kiting the enemy the best he could. Unlucky for him, and my pocket, the wolf chased him to another tree and froze him to death with a chilling howl. The rest of the group eliminated the four wolves, while I made the final wolf kill itself. A successful endeavor, besides the fact that we lost yet another companion.
After charming the dwarf to carry my fallen cousin, I climbed a tree to see if I could find a nearby barbarian settlement that the group had been talking about. I was able to pinpoint some smoke off in the distance, and so I led the way to the trade post. Luckily for me, none of the barbarians in the settlement were even close to my intellect, and so my brother and I do what we did best: we made money. After a number of quick spells to make the merchant stupid and friendly, and make it so that he’d believe anything I said, we got rid of all of our unnecessary items for a large sum of coin, which I believe I split up evenly based on the amount of work put into making it.
With plenty of money in tow, my brother and I made our way to the temple in an attempt to bring back out fallen enemies. It seemed that our kobold-like friend had already failed at getting to priests to revive them, so it was time to put the River Princes to action once again. Since the priests were part of a barbarian tribe, I assumed that they worshiped a God that demanded greatness in battle, and so I showed them the weapon and armor of the fallen orc chieftain. When they asked for the story behind his death, I couldn’t help but strum my banjo and tell them the glorious tale of how I killed Ogreboner by chopping off his cock. Like many of my stories, the priests were entranced by the tale of death and glory.
Our allies were revived, and so we all decided to rest for the night, with our rooms comped because of how amazing and entertaining my performance was. We woke up and all went about our business, with my brother, the kobold, and myself going to the merchant to pick up a couple of items and have him make some fur cloaks for adventuring in the cold. While that was getting done, I went to make the acquaintance of the leader of the barbarians. The chief was a stubborn human fool, like most of the barbarians that I’ve met, and as I called him a coward, I could see the tensing of his muscles as he held himself back. For barbarians of Tempest, they were all more interested in snowballs and pretending to be warriors.
After pissing off the chief, I decided that it was a good idea to pick up our fur cloaks and move on to the keep. Our journey wasn’t long, and the outside was lightly guarded by a couple of orc sentries. I made one of them friendly while we killed the other. I was able to convince the friendly orc that his brethren had betrayed him, and so we made our way into the keep. I had used a silence spell on myself and snuck up to the keep, getting shot at by an arrow. I crawled up the keep and teleported into where a number of archers were help up, casting an obscuring mist in their area so that they couldn’t shoot at my allies.
Making my way past the enemies on the ceiling, I found a secret door in the stonework and opened it to find the rest of my enemies next to, or over, a chasm. We killed the remaining enemies, opened the door to the next area, and explored the dark caverns of the dwarven stronghold. I remained on the ceiling until we found a statue with a shiny ax in its hands. The dwarf grabbed the ax, while my brother popped the jewels from the statues eyes, and then we opened the wooden door in front of us. We fought a few more orcs, eliminating them with much ease, and then we decided to make camp in the bunk room. We blocked the door with a spare bunk bed, and rested up. Our fight through the keep is far from over.
Onyx’s Loot (Debatable)
Handy Haversack, +1 Keen Shortspear, +1 Dagger